Our Baby girl, Whitney Jill

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Well, friends, I have put this off long enough. I have some exciting and sad news to share with you. I wish we could sit down with each of you individually to share this part of our lives with you, but the distances don't allow that. However, we do covet your prayers, however far away you may be.

First the exciting news: We found out last week that i am carrying a precious baby girl. We have named her Whitney Jill. (Jill is Sean's mom's name... Whitney's grandmother who is already in Heaven.) We also found out on our ultrasound last Monday that Whitney has some health and develoment problems. We spent 5 hours at Children's Hospital last Wednesday, and to make a long story short, our baby girl has not been given a good diagnosis. She has multiple problems, several of which the doctors have told us are 'incompatible with life.' Nothing we could have prevented and from what I understand, nothing that I have done wrong... in fact, of all the specialists we talked to (there were quite a few... sonographers, radiologists, genetecists) they have never seen a case so unique and beacuse of that, they really couldn't tell us what to expect, other than she would most likely not survive outside of my womb, and if she did, her quality of life would be next to nothing. (Not exactly something you want to hear!)

We know and believe that God is the ultimate giver of life and that His mercy and goodness never changes, despite our current cicumstances. We know that God has formed her inside of me, and though I don't understand or know why so many things are going wrong with her development inside my womb, I do know that she is God's child first, and our's second. I know that God has breathed life into her, as she still had a beating heart at our last ultrasound. We are choosing not to determine the number of her days, but rather, to allow God to continue to reign supreme in our lives' and in Whitney's, and we trust that He-and He alone- will take her home when He sees fit.

I can tell you that our daughter is the most beautiful baby I have ever seen on ultrasound. I'm sure lots of parents say that, and I've never truly understood that love until now. But I'll tell you this... I have seen many, many ultrasounds and though all are precious babies, none have been as beautiful as she is! The wonderful women I work with have been fasting and praying for the three of us all week, and will even be doing so on Thanksgiving. To say I am humbled and awed by their love and faith is an understatement.

Sean and I's biggest prayer right now is that Whitney will not suffer. If that means God takes her home before we get to hold her in our arms, we will come to be ok with that. Its hard as a mother to have a child inside of me, who I know is so sick, and yet there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. Whitney has been a miracle from the beginning, and we are not in any way doubting she fits into the greater story of the glory of the Kingdom... we are just trying to be faithful to our part in the story.

We are taking it day by day, one hour, one minute at a time. Thank you for your love and prayers and the part that each of you has played and will play in our lives and in Whitney's.

Psalm 145
8 The LORD is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and rich in love.

9 The LORD is good to all;
he has compassion on all he has made.

10 All you have made will praise you, O LORD;
your saints will extol you.

11 They will tell of the glory of your kingdom
and speak of your might,

12 so that all men may know of your mighty acts
and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.

13 Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,
and your dominion endures through all generations.
The LORD is faithful to all his promises
and loving toward all he has made. [c]

14 The LORD upholds all those who fall
and lifts up all who are bowed down.

15 The eyes of all look to you,
and you give them their food at the proper time.

16 You open your hand
and satisfy the desires of every living thing.

17 The LORD is righteous in all his ways
and loving toward all he has made.

18 The LORD is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.

19 He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
he hears their cry and saves them.

20 The LORD watches over all who love him,
but all the wicked he will destroy.

21 My mouth will speak in praise of the LORD.
Let every creature praise his holy name
for ever and ever.

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7 Lovely Words

  1. Oh Shey, I'm so sorry to hear that! But you're right-- Whitney is God's child first, and yours second. I've never seen it written quite like that, but it's so true. Josh and I will be praying for you, Sean, and Whitney.

    I hesitate to even let you know about this next thing, but have decided that I would rather share it ahead of time (and hopefully not need it) rather than not share it (and you need it). If something should happen and the doctors are right and she is not able to live outside of the womb, I want you to know about Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep. It's an organization meant to preserve precious memories during tough times like that. Professional photographers offer their time and talent to make sure that families never forget their little ones.

    Again, I'm not telling you that because I expect it to happen, but because I wish I had known before sweet Kyah was born. It would have made invaluable memories.

    I'm also going to be asking my small group to pray for y'all. :)

  2. Also, Angie Smith (Todd Smith from Selah- his wife) has a baby who was diagnosed as "incompatible with life." She has written a book about it as well.

    To be perfectly honest, I have no idea how you feel or what you're thinking. I'm trying to be helpful, but know that I won't take offense if you never look at any of these links I've mentioned. It's all about you, and I just want to help if I can.

    At any rate, Angie has a blog: http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/
    and a book: "I Will Carry You" (although it hasn't been released yet).

  3. Oh my friend, I can't even begin to imagine what you are feeling but I do know that God's plans are bigger than we can see with our own eyes. I'll be praying for you, Sean and sweet Whitney. If I can do anything more please let me know.

  4. Oh Shey...you, Sean, and your precious little Whitney are in my prayers. Like Susan, I will also be asking my small group to pray for you as well. It's so hard to understand God's plans in hard times, but it is comforting to know that He is in control.

  5. oh shey, tears are streaming down my face, and damn - i'm even at work!

    because i know we are due so close together, and because i just lost my daughter Kendall, please understand that i get what you are going through *as much as i can.* i know our situations are different, but i also know they are alike, and please please know that my heart and prayers are with you. your optimism and faith in God is astounding to me - and such a good example for me, too.

    i'm so glad i have been given the opportunity to "meet" you and keep up with you via our blogs.

    may God bless.


  6. My dear friend..I was awaiting the news of the sex of your baby with such excitement. Whitney is a beautiful name for a beautiful baby girl! I remain optimistic and feel Whitney will continue to be a miracle and a huge testimony of God's power! I wll bepraying for you three. I can tell you guys have given complete control over to God and He will honor that! I love how strong you are..you're such an amazing example of the kid of attitude we as Christians need to have especially while facing trials. Thanx! HUGS!

  7. Shey, I popped over to see what new news there was and I am so very sorry to read this. You and Sean are handling this news better than anyone I've ever seen or heard. Including myself after losing my first baby. I will send you a private note, but please know that there are MANY, MANY people who love you and are praying for you, your family and baby girl. And many of those have been through something similar. Your love and faith will be with her always. I wish we could hug and cry together. But please know I'm thinking of you. -Leah


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