Mom Vanity

Friday, March 23, 2012

I suppose the supporting tagline for this title should be: "P-Dub, Pit Stains and Internet Friends."

Have you ever heard of momvanity?  It might be a word I just made up but its basically the desire of baby mamas to look cute, fashionable and together, all while venturing out into public, grocery shopping, errand running and balancing a baby on your hip.  Not a bad thing to try for- who doesn't like to look together rather than disheveled?  Well I'm here to tell you, its a myth.  And much like catching the elusive tooth fairy in action or searching after the pot o' gold at the end of a rainbow, efforts in chasing such momvanity are futile.  Utterly futile.  Allow me to explain.

Ree Drummond, aka The Pioneer Woman was in town for a cookbook signing yesterday.  Ever since she announced her book tour months ago, I've been counting down the days (and planning my outfit) to it.  I had hoped to go with some friends, or that Sean could go with me, but at the last minute I wound up going with just Gia.  But that was ok by me... She was the whole reason I really wanted to go in the first place... to make a fun memory with her.  Even though I knew she wouldn't remember the day, I would, and could tell her all about it.

The day before, I made Gia this Oklahoma onesie in honor of P-Dub's home state.  I think it turned out so cute! Even better than the first one I made for her several months ago.  I experimented with the machine stitching and LOVE the way it looks!  (I'll post a close-up later.)  And since Gia refuses to wear bows in her head, I also experimented with making her a cute little matching baby ruffle bracelet.  It turned out even cuter than I thought!!  So before we left, Sean came home for lunch and I was able to spend a little extra time on my hair and makeup.  Then, I put on my carefully planned outfit, hurriedly touched up my painted my toenails (gasp! how did I forget to do that last night?!), went back and forth on what jewelry to wear, spritzed myself Victoria's Secret Romantic Wish and called it good.  We had an hour drive to the book signing, so I'd put my lipgloss on in the car when we got closer.  Finally it was time to get Gia dressed.  I put her onesie and skirt on and she looked UH-DORABLE!  The I tried the bracelet on her... and this is what happened:

Homegirl was not happy with the bracelet.  Oh, well.  I'd try again later.  So, my babygirl and I headed out on an adventure to meet Pioneer Woman. 

The drive went fast and Gia was fantastic- slept most of the way. We got there an hour early and there was already a pretty big line outside the Kroger store.  I was armed with a bag FULL of snacks and toys.  But the one thing I didn't anticipate? The brutal sun!  I had sunscreen in the car for Gia but didn't put it on her, and giving the growing crowd, I didn't want to lose my place in line to go back to the car and get it. So, I attempted to keep Gia within the confines of her shaded stroller.  For the most part, she did great but she wanted to stand and crawl all in the stroller... and she's still not walking so I couldn't let her crawl around on the glass-covered side walk.  As the afternoon went on, I could feel the sunburn starting and the pit stains growing.  Oh no!  And did I mention my hair was frizzing?  And that make up I spent a little extra time applying?  M..e...l....t.....i......n........g.  But Gia still looked cute in her OKonesie and skirt.  That is, until I broke out the banana for the sake of peace.  Somehow it wound up ground into her shirt.  Oh, and I forgot to mention the cherry limeaid that Gia spilled ALLOVER the stroller.  Sticky mess! But despite all of this, Gia was an awesome trooper.  She let me pour water over her hair to keep her cool and didn't protest too much about having to stay in the stroller.

Finally, after about 2 hours we got to go inside the store. I was able to let Gia get down and walk, then finally gave in and let her (gasp!) crawl on the Kroger floor. I know, gross.  But at this point, my frizzy haired self cared more about keeping the bean happy than ungermy.  So for another hour, she was great while we waited in the little cafe area of the grocery store.  Everyone around us was oohing and aaahing at how good she was being, and I have to say, I was impressed too.  Next, we moved to the cereal aisle, where we waited for another hour.  She did so good crawling around and looking at all the cartoon characters on the cereal boxes.  Really, even though she was so squirmy and exhausting, she was such a cutie.  She had the ladies all around us thoroughly entertained.  So finally, after 4 hours of waiting, we were told it was almost our turn!!  I had to laugh at the state Gia and I were in:  Me with frizzy hair and raccoon eyes.  My jeans were now saggy from moving around SO much and I'd had to take my earrings off because Gia wanted to eat them.  Lip gloss? LONG gone.  Gia was now skirtless and had a buffet of applesauce, bananas, Baby Mumums and Sweet potato puffs on her shirt.  I did manage to put the skirt, shoes and bracelet back on her before we met PDub.  We walked up to her, had our picture taken, got our cookbook signed (Love to Gianna!) showed off her custom onesie, then headed home.  6 hours for 10 seconds.  Was it worth it?  I think so... I plan on cooking delicious meals from this cookbook, and telling Gia about that one time we waited forever to have Ree sign it. And some day, when Gia is heading out on her own, I'll give her the cookbook with the picture of us in it.  She may not remember it, but I will.  Frizzy hair and applesauce tops, it was worth it.  Because really it was not so much about meeting Pioneer Woman (though I love her and she's awesome and every bit as adorable in person) as it was making memories with my sweet daughter.  And this was definitely something I won't soon forget (or do again anytime soon)!

While I was there, I also got to meet ANOTHER sweet, sweet internet friend, Erin.  She is a baby loss mom, too.  Her sweet boy Christian passed away last year, and I did the birth announcements for him.  We've exchanged many emails and it was so good to finally get to hug her in person after all the (((hugs))) we've exchanged over the past year.

 So back to momvanity.  I still enjoy taking extra time to dress up a little bit, and I appreciate an outfit that makes me feel put-together rather than dowdy.  I'll still paint my nails and dress my baby up in cute outfits, but please don't mistake me-- its not for the purpose of putting on a show or pretending to be something I'm not.  Its so I'll feel and look more human, and less zombie-mom.  Because as any parent can probably tell you, its just a matter of time before you get applesauce on your shirt or pit stains under your arms from chasing around an active baby!  The memory of a moment is so much more valuable than what we were wearing or the time we spent getting ready! 


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  1. So jealous that you got to meet Erin and Ree! I am guilty of momvanity for sure. It always cracks me up when other moms comment on my and Keira's put-togetheredness (it's a word!). I never tell them that it's only to feel like I am a person and not ONLY a mom. I let them think I have my crap together :)


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