I Dream Of....

Thursday, March 31, 2011

I am 35 weeks pregnant now with our Rainbow Baby. So far, the pregnancy has been picture-perfect, from a health stand point. Spot-on weight gain, healthy baby heartbeat, measuring well, no GD, etc. But from an emotional perspective, its been rough.

I am hoping to write more about Carrying our Rainbow after Carrying our Angel, as there are just so many emotions and dynamics. But if I got into that, I'd forget what I wanted to write in this post originally! So that post will have to wait.

Dreaming about Gianna has been very difficult for me. I have vivid, horrible pregnancy dreams-- those seem to come easily- but when it comes to daydreaming about the baby girl we will hold in 35 days or less (!!!!!!!!!), I break out in a cold sweat. Kind of ironic that its not the nightmares that bring my anxiety, but the daydreams.

Because of our living and job situation, we obviously don't have a nursery for Gianna. A pack-n-play in the basement bedroom of my in-laws' home will be Gia's nest for a little bit. I am so thankful that we have this steady place for her. And it definitely makes it easier to remain in denial that a baby will be coming home very soon. But the downside is, that is definitely makes it easier to reamin in denial that a baby will be coming home very soon!

Sean and I have been looking here and there to stock up on some winter clothing for Gia, since we are at the end of the winter season. We've found a few good sales with some great deals for 6-12 month winter clothing (long-sleeve shirt from Old Navy for $0.47!), but it freaks. me. out. Having a baby shower freaked me out. I loved it, but it was very hard emotionally.

Don't get me wrong, I am over the moon excited about bringing Gia home and having her in our family and doing all the things I've been dreaming of doing for years. I feel blessed beyond measure to have two babies in a year. SO BLESSED. But when I start to look to that day that she will finally be in my arms-- breathing, squirming and screaming-- I just can't see it. Correction: I just can't believe it. So to 'get prepared' for bringing her home raises my heartrate every time.

But I know that I need to dream about Gianna. I need to picture her in my arms, all pink and warm. Because that is called HOPE. And our God is a God of HOPE. So I've let myself shop for some clothes, and I started making some hairbands for her. I've packed a hospital bag with tiny newborn onesies and sleepers. Because that is normal. And I've let myself bookmark countless baby girl crafty projects. (That may or may not be normal.) Just like the Baby 'Bellies posts I've been putting up, thinking about these things raise my excitement for Gianna and make me anticipate her arrival into our world... something I cannot WAIT for!

The point of all these ramblings? I've come across some great ideas for things I'd love to do with Gianna in her first year of life. So I want to document the ideas here so they don't get lost in my bajillion bookmarks. :) So here are a couple ideas I've seen & loved in the bloggy world.

1. Pic a week: This comes from one of my fave homey blogs, Young House Love. They had a daughter last year, just a few months after I had Whitney. They have taken a picture of their baby every week for this whole year! And they've collected different fabric backgrounds for each picture to be taken on! I love this idea, and I love collecting fabric! So I've started buying some cute clearance fabrics (hell-o $1.50/yard!) to build up my stash for this project. I have a couple ideas on what to do with all the fabric at the end of her first year, but I'll write about those later. I thought I might ask friends and family to send me some pretty fabrics if they see any at a good price, too. Its not very expensive, since all I will need is 1/2-1 yard! Anyways, you can see Young House Love's pics of their cutie on their Flickr Stream.

2. Quotes on Pics: This idea came from Baby Making(g) Machine. I LOVE the quotes she's put on these random pictures of her little one. She is doing a 365 Love Letters to her baby. It looks like she has taken a picture a day of her babe, and I don't think I will do that. BUT I do love the quotes she's added to the photos. So maybe I will try to do something like this on a monthly basis... one on each of her monthly birthdays, using pictures from that time frame.

So there are a couple of my ideas with things I want to do with Gianna. I will document more here as I think of them. :) Do any of you have fun ideas of ways to document your LO's first year?

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4 Lovely Words

  1. I am more excited for Gianna...eagerly waiting to see your notorious baby. Wow! Too much of excitement. Hurrah!

  2. Those posts were both awesome ideas. If we ever have another baby, I would love to do the photo a week on the different fabrics. That is ADORABLE.

    I did take a picture (or 10) every day for the first year, but after the first year... everything went downhill. Now, I don't pull out my camera nearly enough. I have 5 or 6 photo albums of just her first year. Pretty ridiculous, but I LOVE looking back at all of them. Very amazing. If I didn't have all of the pictures, I am not sure I would be able to remember how tiny she was. They just grow up too fast! :)

    Anyways, I can't believe you only have a little over a month until your due date. I will be thinking of you and checking in often. :)

  3. Oops - the comment by "A" was under my other e mail address, but not my normal blog. I am sorry! Just wanted you to know who I was. :)

  4. Shey...

    I cried as I read this. Because I SO get it. Today would have been Kendall's 1st birthday. And I ache so much...and being pregnant with Avery has been difficult emotionally for me too. I literally felt like you took the words out of my mouth.

    You were blessed with Whitney and Gianna. She's going to come and soon you get to hold her in your arms and marvel at her beauty and life and I can't wait for that day for you!


Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I'd love to hear from you!